I am always dealing with deadlines, whether it is end of month reports, letting friends know when to make plans, ordering pizza before they close (happens more then you would think) deadlines drive a lot of my life and the lives of others. I keep thinking about my big deadline that is looming, how long before proposing before Jayme gets anxious about the situation.

It has been over a year of solid dating and living together for over 9 months. I don’t want it to feel like waiting for waiting sake, but it would be nice to get our future move all locked in place. Have a set plan. But then I catch myself wondering, why? why do I need to wait for some deadline to pass before I do what I want to? I have no doubts about it happening  or on the plan we have figured out.

Jayme is it, she has found a way to be everything at once, meet my needs, my expectations, all while handling my flaws. I am at peace when I am with her but also excited at the same time. There is no deadline to meet before making this decision, I think it might be time to set the plan in motion, to start the actual coordinating and details of presenting with Jayme the only thing I can to show my appreciation for her love, all of me.

Life upcoming will be made sweeter and fuller with my forever partner.

Ahh what a great holiday weekend it was, we played games, saw family (we were iced out from seeing my mom, but were able to get together with some of Jayme’s family still.) It was a great time and I could have not asked for much more excitement. We had all day Monday to lounge around and just be lazy. We did normal couple-ly things and were headed to bed for one last sleep before I headed back to work.

Here is where the title for the post comes from. Jayme hates when cold air “rushes” <-(her word not mine) into the bed when I roll over or move my legs. it is a point of contention most nights, but last night was the last straw, she told me to “stop it” and after struggling to get my phone to charge, I took my half of the blankets and sheet, took them from the bed and gave them to her. I went out into the living room, snagged a blanket and tried to return to sleep in our bed. I was allowed free movement in this new blanketed setting, I could move my legs spin to my hearts content, it felt great. At first. I slept terribly, without having the bigger warmer blankets I was chilled and could not fall asleep for long, in addition my bed-space was smaller due to the huge lump of my wood-be blankets piled between us. I woke today exhausted and wanting nothing more then to be back under the blankets I belong in.

Jayme welcomed me back, clearly felt bad for her part, and I did too. We were both so tired we never talked about it, maybe we will tonight, but it doesn’t matter, cause I know how the conversation will go. I will say I am sorry, she will too, we will talk through the problem and do our best to understand each other. Not because I can see the future, but because that is how we solve problems. words, thoughtfulness, and empathy.

In a small way this blanket situation is much like what it is like to be in a relationship. It is cozy and comfortable together, but it also comes with restrictions, rules if you will. learning to work together through them helps to prevent problems from arising. You can go it alone, try and do your own thing (in the context of the relationship) but you will be missing the warm and soothing love that comes from sharing in your struggle and solving it together.

One thing I know for sure, I will not be leaving that warm comforter for anything again.

 

Wow, It has been awhile since I wrote a post. I had all intentions of writing, but time got away from me. But I am here now and ready to make up for the lack of sap and romance.

So Christmas is approaching and it always seems to be a time of year that is full of love and happiness. Buying gifts, attending parties, drinking a few more drinks then needed, a generally great time. But what makes it feel even more extraordinary is having Jayme by my side for all of it. last weekend we went out to my dads for the holiday, we played on the ice, went for walks, watched the Vikings game (inside a BARELY heated cabin), it was everything I could ask for. But she was not just there with me, she was present in the moment, she engaged, enjoyed herself, was exactly the woman I want to be my PIC. She has such a loving and gentle way about her, but one that also allows me to be me. she does not harness or control, she embraces and loves me for all the parts of me (minus the farts, but her objection is well documented already).

Perhaps it is just the extra love in the air this time of year, but I feel it stronger and stronger with each passing day. Jayme has not let me down once. She has been steadfast in our love and also in her support for me. We have agreed to not buy gifts for each other, but the truth is, she is the greatest gift I could ever ask for. So as we prepare for another holiday weekend, I am so thankful for me Journey With Jayme.

 

Dec. 6th is my birthday. I love my birthday and I am zero percent ashamed of it. I like seeing the nice things people say, getting to be with friends, phone calls, the whole thing. It also reminds me I am one year closer to eventually being a real adult (whatever that means). And this is also the same day that Jayme and I became “Official” even though we were completely head over heels with each other long before that night I called from the hotel lobby of my brother’s bachelor party. But this day is the actual day it happened, so not only is it my birthday, but it is the “birth” of our relationship. The beginning to the next chapter of my life.

This was the first time Jayme was able to buy a gift for me and she knocked it out of the park! The big whiskey cubes I was eyeing up, a wooden watch that I could not stop “pining” over, and a super cute 29 reasons why I love you note. It was perfect, but more then just the gifts is how she acted during this week. She made sure that I was treated extra special, she told me to do whatever it was I wanted, she made special meals, she, she was exactly the person I know her to be. Her behavior was not out of character, or over the top. It is what you would come to expect from a girlfriend who loves their boyfriend in the way She loves me. Things are still new, still fresh, but also so settled and worn in, and I love every bit of it.

So I was preparing to write a new post today, but this old title popped up. I have a specific story that goes with it that I will share, but it fits so well with my thoughts last night that I think a little additional information should be added.

The original story was about the night I went to trivia alone. Jayme was meeting some friends for HH and I was going to stay at home and just relax, but I had a desire to play trivia (we go most Thursdays). Well I could not convince anyone to join on such short notice, so I went to play alone. Jayme texted me halfway through that she was leaving soon, I filled her in on where I was and she was debating coming to sit with me, but there would be so little time for her there that it was not really worth it. So I was finishing up with a question and I feel a tap on my shoulder and it was my babe in all her beauty. Of course I wanted her to come, but I couldn’t just tell her that. I wanted her to want to be there.

Clearly this was not the most convenient or “worth it” situation, but she did it for me, she showed up, partly because, that is what she does, she puts importance on me and how I feel. It is something I will cherish forever, but also something I often forget. I have not had many situations in relationships where I have felt the tender caring that Jayme provides all the time. and much like this situation, last night Jayme helped to remind me of this trait of hers.

I was feeling kinda down for a number of reasons, but partly my birthday plans were not coming together as I would have wanted. I am to blame really, I never organized soon enough and it is a hard time of the year to begin with. So I was struggling with it. She told me just to do exactly what I wanted and not think about what others would want. So she pushed me to plan a night with the guys; whiskey, games, gambling, the whole thing. It felt good to have her give up our place to host the guys and just be completely selfless. She said “it is your birthday, do what you want”. And in the end, I intend to. I canceled the guys get-together this morning, found a great restaurant with a good happy hour and will go for a fine drink and amazing meal with my babe. What I want, and have always wanted is her, to show her how much I appreciate the woman who showed up.